Comments on my Essay Enlightened Christianity and the Slavery Debate between Benjamin Rush and Richard Nisbet

May 16, 2011

Your full draft makes a good start toward examining Rush’s antislavery ideas in the context of late eighteenth century antislavery thought. I still think you have some ways to go articulating an original argument here, based on Prof. Landsman’s assessment of the paper, which he shared with me.


I agree with Prof. Landsman that your interpretation is still too imprecise in explaining what specifically Rush borrows from the Scottish enlightenment. Prof. Landsman suggests some very useful ways to go forward with your argument. If you are to publish this article, you will need to put his suggestions into action. I think it would be very good for you to try one more time to sharpen your argument as Prof. Landsman suggests while the material is still fresh in your mind.
I will also repeat a comment I made on the earlier version because you have not yet addressed the problem. “There is still a marked imbalance between your in depth discussion of Rush's early religious training and education and your cursory treatment of Nisbet’s background. If you want the reader to believe that as on Rush, but you need to provide what you can get, for the sake of balance. If you're going to relate Rush's antislavery views to his religious and educational background, why not do the same for Nisbet?” If you do not want to give Nisbet equal time, perhaps you can play down the article ‘s claim to be examining the Rush-Nisbet debate. If you are primarily using Nisbet only as a foil to bring out Rush’s ideas with greater clarity, then state that and do not pretend to be doing a full examination of the debate itself.

Finally, you would do well to revise this draft with a focus on improving the prose style. I am leaving a marked up copy in your mailbox indicating some places where the meaning of your prose is unclear. You need to consult the Chicago manual of style and learn the rules for citing book titles (they should be underlined) and pamphlets (their titles can be in quotation marks.) After the first full citation, you can use a short title for subsequent references. Also, if you use Ibid, you do not need to give the author’s name.

If you do no further revision on the paper, I will probably give in an A-. It needs more work to get an A for the course.